To end it all, the endless pain,
The rage, the hurt, the tears,
To end it all, how easy, too easy,
The people to leave behind
To never be able to say "I love you"
To tell them, however many times,
To go on forever like this,
Just one more person, no one cares,
But you care, for others,
And maybe they do care,
To not know, to never find out
Would you rather go on?
All this hate, for who? You?
A mask is what they see,
No one knows you,
Would they still love you?
If they knew the real you.
No bravery, no happiness, nothing special,
For hem to find it was all an act,
Or to let them remember you,
The way they need to remember you,
The way you need them to remember you,
Would you be missed?
Would people look back?
And sigh or spare a tear,
To remember the good times,
What good times?
There were none, not with you.
To carry on being the person you've moulded,
Created a person for others,
To shut out every loved one,
To loose the friendship of those who loved the shield,
But fear the person inside,
But to let them see,
The me they don't want to see,
But the person inside wasn't,
Needs desperately to be seen,
To shout the truth,
The person inside,
The coward, weak and frightened child,
Would people accept?
To suddenly find someone different,
Standing in my place,
Different from the person they've always known,
To know I'm able to cry,
To feel pain, I feel, I want, I need,
Just like them.
For them to find out I'm not strong, not able.
Hope seems distant,
But its there, if only I could reach out and touch it,
With the help of a friend I know I could,
But to tell another would mean to show, express, trust,
As soon as the person is seen, glimpsed.
If only for a second,
And noticed, loved,
Hope would be nearer, closer.
Not much but still closer,
To end it all? Cowardly.
To fight, to carry on, to change,
To the person I really am?
Frightening, but bearable,